WHEN WE DON’T SPEAK; THE STIGMA WINS !

Hafsa Riaz
4 min readMay 21, 2021

--

My Experience With Anxiety!

I was standing at the borderline between Anxiety and OCD. What if I had taken a few steps ahead toward OCD. Would I be the same person I am now! Maybe one day I can answer it because right now I can't!

That winter morning, walking down the green lush narrow passage just to take a shortcut to college, she was fully donned up and cheering along with new friends, suddenly the wide smile faded and cold sweats replaced her cheers, she just looked around and thought, "Am I hallucinating?", ’ yeah I would be '

The first sign she ignored..!

Maybe she was trying to mask herself. Maybe just a bit of rashness would let her dive. She thought she could just pass by those signs or just forget the traumas but she couldn't let it be.

She was so much engrossed in doing so that she ignored the raising volcanoes within her and the symptoms grew on and on harshly.

“Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.”

― Søren Kierkegaard, The Concept of Anxiety: A Simple Psychologically Orienting Deliberation on the Dogmatic Issue of Hereditary Sin

Just when she reached the peak of her emotions.Extreme emotions making her lose her long perceived cold demeanor and serene composure.

She feared losing herself in those whorls of pointless dilemma. Simply put; even the voice of her loved ones would irritate her. Every single person who came to her or just her friend's laughing; She just wanted to throw them out of the window (lol).

That was the moment when her friend made her realize her abnormal behavior and lost smile and asked her to see a doctor, but she was like; No way, I am not a psycho!.

But deep down she knew she was not ok! In the middle of the night, she woke up and secretly did an online Anxiety Test

By the way here is the link to it ;

https://www.psycom.net/anxiety-test

FINALLY, she started getting anxiety attacks more often, and being left out with no other option she went to the doctor, and after the turmoil of rollercoaster-like emotions, she came to know the unexpected truth.

Those 10 years old suffering traumas had not really left her but she had just locked those up in some part of her memory but not cleared yet. Thus she had to bear the consequences. Applause to the divine psychiatrist, she could get over anxiety.

Returning from the hospital, after a long crying session and sorting out her feelings, that very moment, she realized she had to let loose her composure to treat herself. She sat on the wooden bench and felt the cool breeze tingling her heart.

It had been a very long time since she felt alive, maybe she had voiced out all of her grievances or maybe she was just tired after so many years, whatever it was she was just happy for herself.

PATH TO RECOVERY :)

I can't say it was hard though but it was also not an easy shot.

I changed my lifestyle just like calling the north pole THE SOUTH POLE. But I had no other choice so I had to follow the rules, CHESS PIECES that were laid before me I had to play them.

The difference was just that I was fighting with myself and no one else.

Sticking to a healthy routine can help depression sufferers feel a sense of purpose and of being in control of their minds.

Here are some tips and rules I followed and I think anyone should follow to escape this Dark cave;

■ SOMEONE TO HAVE THE HEART TO HEAR TALK.

Either a close friend or any close person to your heart. Just talk to them if they are trustworthy and understand you. They can help you cope with the problems.

■ MILD MEDICATIONS

Some say it's useless to take medications but trust me that's not it. When a certain limit exceeds, you need to take them. Just consult your doctor to keep it mild, so that you don't become dependent on them.

■ SELF MEDITATION

It is as important as medicine. You need to meditate in the cool breeze and feel yourself, talk to the one hidden in you and let it breathe.

■ EXERCISE

At the start, it was difficult for me but then I got used to it and became an exercise addict. Believe me, it is the most natural way to relax your mind and body.

■ DAILY WALK

At least 30 min walk daily. I got an app for step count and early in the morning I did it in the lush jogging track of my area and it was worth it.

■ DIET

Try your best to keep it natural but if your body is healthy. The mind will simply not get a chance to probe into your serene life. I used to drink one orange glass per day. Keep junk food minimal. I know we can't cut it off. But minimalize it.

■ SUPPLIMENTS

Consult your doctor and get brain boosters like vitamins and other nutrients thus with time you won't need any medicine. You would be the controller of your brain just like how I am now.

--

--

Hafsa Riaz

Medico👨‍⚕️ | SEO Article Writer | Dollar eyed $$